The Grammys!

1. Beyond the major categories, there are some surprisingly decent bands and artists nominated for awards that you might not expect. These include No Age (Best Recording Package for their debut album Nouns), Flight of the Conchords (Best Comedy Album), Justice (nominated for Best Remixed Recording, Non-Classical for their “Electric Feel” remix), and The Mars Volta (Best Hard Rock Performance for “Wax Simulacra”).

2. Despite the fact that it was slept on by pretty much everyone under 25; Robert Plant and Allison Krauss’collaboration album, entitled Raising Sand, is pretty damn good. For those of you out there pining for a Zeppelin reunion after the surviving members one-off show in London, I have just three words – get over it. I mean, honestly, does anyone really want to see a 60-year-old Plant attempt to fit into those leather pants and wail the lyrics to “Black Dog”? (Really, think about it before you answer.) Luckily with this album, Plant chose to age gracefully and return to his musical roots of Robert Johnson and Delta blues musicians. He also enlists songstress Krauss to be the bluegrass-country beauty to his grizzled, but still tender beast, while the legendary T-Bone Burnett handles the production duties. If you haven’t heard any of the songs off the album, including “Gone, Gone, Gone (Done Moved On)” (originally written and performed by The Everly Brothers) and “Fortune Teller” (originally written and performed by Plant and Zep bandmate Jimmy Page), you should check them out here at the duo’s website.

3. Here is why I’m rooting for M.I.A., Radiohead and Lil Wayne in their respective categories (you know, besides the fact that they were three of the best albums of the years, and its nice to see the Academy voters take their heads out of their asses and actually pay attention for once): the fact that acceptance speeches from any of the three could be potentially awesome. How entertaining would it be to see a nine-month pregnant M.I.A. clumsily make her way up onstage to accept an award? Or how about Weezy, if he doesn’t win, pulling a drunken Kanye West? Heck, even inviting Thom Yorke to be Thom Yorke, would be worth the price of admission alone. C’mon, anyone’s better than having to listen to Chris Martin rattle on.

4. Compared to the past ceremonies, which has seen everyone from Feist to Avril to Arcade Fire, there’s a slim pickings for Canadian Grammy nominees this year. Some of the respectable few this year include Neil Young, Michael Cera and Ellen Page (for the Juno soundtrack), Rufus Wainwright and Toronto’s own electronica wizard Deadmau5.

5. Real music fans might be confused as to the list of nominees for this year’s Best New Artist. Duffy and Adele are similar sounding British soul singers, with Duffy having a slight edge because her “hit” (I use that term loosely) “Mercy”, was used recently in a Nivea commercial (hey, economic times are tough, you have to make a dollar the best you can). I thought Jazmine Sullivan was an American Idol winner, but it turns out she’s just another generic, Alicia Keys-wannabe R&B diva. As for Lady Antebellum, they…umm…are a country trio from Nashville that had a song featured on an episode of The Hills. I look forward to all of these nominees fading into relative obscurity in about two years. I also concluded that if the Jonas Brothers win, I may just gouge out my eyeballs. It seems like the logical reaction to me anyway.

6. This isn’t really relevant to this year’s Grammys, but is it too early to consider the Slumdog Millionairesoundtrack for Best Compilation Soundtrack Album For Motion Picture, Television Or Other Visual Medianext year? I finally got the chance to check out this movie that everyone’s been talking about last weekend and I have to say, it is one of the best movies that I’ve seen in a long, long time. Gorgeous cinematography, top notch acting and directing, amazing music – it’s no wonder the movie is nominated for ten awards at the upcoming Oscars (which are on February 22). Another reason to love this movie is that it was responsible for introducing Indian composer extraordinaire A.H. Rahman to a Western audience, who has been nominated for a pair of Oscars.

7. You know what livens up a boring awards show? Why, drinking games, of course!!! Here are some suggestions to help you get started:
- Someone thanks their “agent, spouse, parents, or kids.”
- They cut off a person’s acceptance speech unceremoniously with the “exit” music.
- Any time a presenter’s jokes falls flat.
- Any profanity heard that somehow slips past network censors.
- If a winner thanks a diety other than God.
- Anytime there is a shot of Bono in the crowd wearing those stupid sunglasses.

8. The Grammy Awards have a long history of strange, unexpected song hookups, but this year they may have outdone themselves. I mean, Paul McCartney featuring Dave Grohl on vocals? Jay-Z, T.I., Lil Wayne and Kanye performing “Swagga Like Us”? But all of this is dwarfed by recent news from the Blink-182 camp, who announced that the trio will be appearing together as presenters for the first time onstage since December 2004. Watch this and relive the late 90s all over again!

9. The one thing about the Grammys that you can count on is that you can count on anything at the Grammys. This is the award show that gave the 1992 Best Rock Song Grammy to Eric Clapton’s unplugged and slowed-down version of “Layla” (never mind that the original came out in 1970) over Nirvana’s iconic “Smells Like Teen Anthem”, snubbed Elvis Costello (who was considered shoo-in for Best New Artist) in 1978, and showed no love for The Beatles’ “Yesterday” when it was nominated. When it comes to handing out the hardware, there are no guaranteed safe (or sensible for that matter) bets.

10. However, here’s one thing that you can count on at the Grammy Awards: Walter Ostanek will be nominated for the Best Polka Album. “Canada’s polka king”, Ostanek has been nominated twenty-one times, and has won the award three times. His newest album is entitled Back to Back Hall of Fame Polkas and it’s a guaranteed rollicking good time.

Cheers,
Max